Ladies and gentlemen, I give you Dschinghis Khan. This band is a living testament to the pure unholy power of German disco and 70's Euro pop. Besides being the best dressed band from Germany ever, they sound like a German ABBA coked up and watered down with a bit more Europe and a lot more gay thrown in for good measure.

The reasons I love these guys: They look like an Eastern Bloc Village people, their name means Ghengis Khan in German (why?), and they sing songs about ancient history ("Machu Picchu, Machu Picchu, where the secrets are at home"), anthems to various cities (Rome ("Romulus and Remus the two brothers, raised among the wolves like no others") and Moscow. The lyrics to that "hit" are fantastic:

Moscow Moscow drinking vodka all night long
Keeps you happy, makes you strong,
A ha ha ha ha - ha!
Moscow Moscow come and have a drink and then
you will never leave again, a ha ha ha ha ha!

Bear with me, folks. Here is a video for that song. It's the German version, but don't worry, because it is fan fucking tastic. Wait for the guy who lookes like Santa Claus from Euro Disney Berlin to bust out fucking floor moves. Check it out: http://www.i-am-bored.com/bored_link.cfm?link_id=6287" title="http://www.i-am-bored.com/bored_link.cfm?link_id=6287" target="_blank"http://www.i-am-bored.com/bor...

If you want to hear more of their music, at the bottom of ths page are a few mp3 links and a sweet picture and bio as well: http://www.menet.umn.edu/" title="http://www.menet.umn.edu/" target="_blank"http://www.menet.umn.edu/%7Egladkov/music/dschingh is_khan.htm#samples

I for one want their box set on my Ipod.

Nothing makes me happier than watching Jean Claude inflict his trademark
"Van Damage" on a dancefloor. (thanks to Mantis for this gem!)

So I'm on vacation till next monday. I'm slightly broke, but its nice to have time to read and sleep as much as I want. Last night I slept so long I woke up tired from sleeping. That's the best. It's good timing for a break because the godamned blizzard dumped way to much snow to be tromping through to get to the train in the morning. And my parents are in Florida, the bastards. Any thoughts on what the hell I should do with myself for the next 6 days? I'm all ears.

So check out this video of this weatherman I snagged from boing boing. I guess he got fired from his job for substance abuse, and probably for being such an asshole. Just watch this to see why. This guy is a Grade A douchebag. Bonus: he raps, too! check it: http://www.wiredvideo.com/cli...

"Quite possibly one of the most beautiful prints I have ever seen. A large side view of Dr. Timothy Leary surrounded by smaller profiles of him with symbols from his SMI2LE theory. With rainbow musical notes flowing into skulls and crossbones covering his body. It is 7 ½ inches by 7 ½ inches square, and is comprised of 900 ¼ inch hits."


Yadig and Mantis's comments on a previous post got me hunting and I found this site. It's a gallery of LSD art. Some of these are amazing!! I'm fascinated by art in strange places. And no place is more strange than the face of a sheet of Acid. Check these out! http://www.erowid.org/chemicals/lsd/lsd_ima ges_gallery1.shtml" title="http://www.erowid.org/chemicals/lsd/lsd_ima ges_gallery1.shtml" target="_blank"http://www.erowid.org/chemica...

My boy James sent me these...from some contest held by a newspaper to give new definitions of words..I like the last one!

1. Coffee (n.), a person who is coughed upon.

2. Flabbergasted (adj.), appalled over how much weight you have gained.

3. Abdicate (v.), to give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach.

4. Esplanade (v.), to attempt an explanation while drunk.

5. Willy-nilly (adj.), impotent.

6. Negligent (adj.), describes a condition in which you absentmindedly answer the door in your nightgown.

7. Lymph (v.), to walk with a lisp.

8. Gargoyle (n.), an olive flavored mouthwash.

9. Flatulence (n.) the emergency vehicle that picks you up after you are run over by a steamroller.

10. Balderdash (n.), a rapidly receding hairline.

11. Testicle (n.), a humorous question on an exam.

12. Rectitude (n.), the formal, dignified demeanor assumed by a proctologist immediately before he examines you.

13. Oyster (n.), a person who sprinkles his conversation with Yiddish expressions.

14. Circumvent (n.), the opening in the front of boxer shorts.

15. Pokemon (n.), A Jamaican proctologist.

I'm bored, and feeling a little fuzzy from Nyquil, so I wanted to write. I can't seem to get to sleep, so I might as well hypnotize myself with this computer screen. Last night I slept 10 hours, and started having really weird dreams come morning time. I had a dream that Yoda taught me the force by making me levitate tennis balls in my parents backyard. You'd think Yoda was all cool and shit from watching the movies, but he was kind of a prick in my dream. Very bossy little twat. "Do this, and do that", he would say. Why don't you do it, you muppet ass motherfucker? I really wanted to drop kick him.

I did laundry this evening, and someone stole my fucking laundy bag. Honestly, who steals laundry bags? I mean, if you go to a laundromat, presumably you have laundry with you, and most likely have it in a laundry bag. Do people go there just to steal these things? I dont get it. Anyway, I'm not mad about losing the bag itself, its just the principle. You understand. I got nothing else to say, so here's a picture of Lancelot Link and The Evolution Revolution.

I woke up this morning, and it was raining. Again. It's been raining since before I can remember remembering. And its Apocalyspe warm today, like 60 degrees in January in New York! Meanwhile, there's 15 feet of snow in Calfornia. Go figure.

So me and Frank get to the train station and I swear to Jesus Christ all of Queens New York was there. Then the train pulls up, and its already jam packed. I, being a bit claustrophobic, started getting edgy. Some swarthy little guy behind me kept hitting me in the legs with his umbrella, and I so wanted to go Steven Segal on him. I was really getting annoyed. Then Frank spotted this guy. (Camera phones kick ass.)

All of a sudden being surrounded by a sea of grizzly frowning assholes with their little white ear buds and their lifeless stares became less offensive, because this guy was on fire! He was sitting there, ripping up newspapers in strips, and would yell at random times things that are dangerously hillarious. Between his mumbling swearathon, The ones I remember were:

"All you gotta do is just get rifle, put a knife on the end of it..."

"Fuck, I just want a free ride, lady!"

"I'm gonna blow up this whole godamned place!"

Wow. Its nice to laugh early in the morning. The sheer inappropriateness of what he was saying made me laugh and smile all the way to work. New York is a funny place. Happy weekend, everyone. Lets make it through Friday and then its drinky time! I think its a good night for karaoke..

Call me crazy, but fire kicks ass. Something about it just rocks. God must have been drunk when he made it, cause it's both dangerous and exciting at the same time. Earth, metal, and water all take the bus compared to fire. I don't know why I like it so much. I think it's primal, imbedded in my ancient Viking DNA. Like when I went to my mountain lair for New Years, all I could do with myself was smoke cigs, pace around, and make fucking fires. I was obsesssed with keeping the fire going at any cost. I was silly with it. This got me thinking; Who else is fire obsessed?

Ladies and gentlemen, I give you Mr. Inferno. Brian Concannon claims to be the most extreme daredevil performer in Australia, and I'd reckon he's probably right. Most people like to read and listen to music to have fun. Apparently Brian likes to light himself on fire and hurl himself off of fucking cliffs. What a bad ass. Peace to Rinna, this guy is representing Australia to the fullest. Why can't I have neighbors like this? If I ever open a bar, it will have guys like this jumping off the roof and little chimpanzees taking bets on their fates and drink orders. Check him out here: http://www.go-offextreme.com.au/" title="http://www.go-offextreme.com.au/" target="_blank"http://www.go-offextreme.com....  

Over to Scotland..I would love to go to this!! The Stone Haven Fireball ceremony which commences at the stroke of midnight on Hogmanay (December the 31st), is believed to date back to pagan times. People basically walk up and down the street whipping giant fucking fireballs around their heads. (I really think this might be my calling in life.) It's aim has been to drive out the "deil" and ward of evil spirits that might blight the prosperity or wellbeing of the town and its inhabitants. But hell, who needs a reason to swing a giant fireball around town? All I'd need is a bucket of Guiness, and nothing would make more sense to me. Check it out..(thanks to Mog for sending me this!) http://www.stonehavenfireball...

Happy 2005 everyone! I've been off the grid for a few days, toiling away at work and shit. I've basically been real busy, but I haven't had a proper place to blog..I woke up early the other day, sat down in my computer chair and leaned back too far and my chair broke! One of the legs just snapped, sending me crashing to the floor and landing on what was left of the crappy chair right in the back! I felt like someone took a aluminum bat and whipped me right in the base of my spinal cord..Ouch..It was so ridiculous I had to laugh at myself. I'm such a retard my furniture kicks my ass. So my new years resolutions are simple. And chock full of cliches.

#1: Get fucking rich.

I swear to God I want a dump truck full of money by the end of the year. I want Scrooge McDuck swimming in coins in a big ass vault type money. Why not? I think I deserve it, dammit.

#2: Get active.

I know, everyone says the'll get healthy every year. I might be full of shit too..We'll see what happens. Only time will tell.

#3: Show my friends and family more love.

Life is short, and watching TV convinces me The apocalypse might be right around the corner. So this year I plan on showing those close to me that I care.

#4: Get on the dancefloor...

Well probably not..But I would if I could dance like Mr.Dynamite..I probably have other resolutions, but can't seem to remember them..Hopefully 2005 will bring us all good fortune. So what are some of yours?